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dolorosa_12) wrote2013-08-30 03:24 pm
dolorosa_12) wrote2013-08-30 03:24 pm
Entry tags:
More on Pretty Little Liars
I seem to have Pretty Little Liars on the brain. Since not much is happening on that front on LJ/Dreamwidth, I've been making lightening raids on Tumblr, diving into the PLL tag and emerging swiftly with bits of meta and commentary about the season 4A finale reveal and the series in general. I'm only skimming the surface, as going back to Tumblr properly would be a really bad idea. Reblogging and Ronni do not mix.
But I find myself wanting to respond to something I read today. I'm putting the rest of this behind a cut, because it contains spoilers, and also some discussion of bullying, abusive relationships and a relationship between a teacher and student.
The link is to a great piece of commentary by Tumblr user Prozacpark, and is about the relationship between Toby and Spencer. Prozacpark views Toby as abusive - and I think this reading is correct. Where I differ is whether the text frames this abuse with approval or not.
The thing about this show is firstly that it puts the friendships of teenage girls front and centre, and makes the things about those relationships that are normally deplored (their intensity, the high value placed on them by girls, their potential for 'drama') and makes them heroic and shows them to be a source of strength. (It arguably does the same for other relationships between girls and women - romantic relationships between lesbians, relationships between mothers and daughters, but to a much lesser extent.) What's amazing is less that the main characters have strong friendships with other girls, but that those friendships are the central relationship and the entire story of the show as a whole. Their antagonist(s) bully and abuse them in a kind of stereotypical Mean Girls way: harassing them online and through text messages, threatening to share their deepest secrets, trying to get them to turn on another in an exaggerated version of schoolyard politics. (That this bullying and abuse is actually life-threatening is entirely the point. Just as female relationships are celebrated for their strength, their darker side is taken seriously as a threat.) So all relationships outside this central friendship - romantic, familial or friendships with boys with whom the characters are not romantically involved - are secondary. That's not to say that they're not deeply important, but they are not the focus of the show or the driving force of the narrative.
Secondly, Toby is abusive and isolating towards Spencer, but I think that's entirely the point. The show has a pretty bleak attitude towards relationships between teenage girls and boys or men. Let's recap:
Apart from Emily's father, all the fathers on the show are indifferent on a good day and manipulative and controlling on a bad day towards their daughters. More specifically, they either explicitly or implicitly attempt to control their daughters' sexuality. (That's not to say that they don't sometimes voice valid disapproval of their daughters' actions - something I'll get back to later.) They also lie to their daughters and lie to their partners about very serious things in their lives. Apart from Emily's father, they are not trustworthy.
Every other male character not currently in a relationship with one of the Liars has either attempted to kill them or been involved in the A Team in some manner.
Caleb is the only boyfriend of the main three girls-who-are-attracted-to-guys not to behave in an abusive manner (and, if you think the female love interest is getting off lightly, I'll add that Paige was initially abusive towards Emily).
Ezra Fitz, is, at least heavily involved in the A Team (although if he's the one ultimately calling the shots I will be very surprised), was in a long-term relationship with Aria, a girl he knew was a teenager and who was and still is his student. I actually really liked their relationship (because I have a thing for fictional relationships with power imbalances), but of course would have found it horrifying in real life. While I don't think he behaved in a particularly controlling manner towards Aria (at least not on the surface, but if he's on the A Team, he's good at manipulating people and probably was able to make it seem that she was the one calling the shots in the relationship), the fact remains that such a relationship was highly inappropriate and open for abuse. I detest Aria's father, but he was right in being horrified at this relationship.
And Toby, too, is abusive and controlling. As the linked Tumblr post points out, he uses Spencer's fear of abandonment as a way of controlling her, and very deliberately isolates her from her friends.
It's my contention, however, that the show is aware of this and subtly makes its disapproval known. That is the beauty of this show. Men are, for the most part, controlling, and they fear nothing more than the sexuality and power of teenage girls, and the strength that they draw from their friendships. If you find such a friendship, hold onto it, cherish it, fight viciously for it, for it's within such friendships that you will be able to carve out a space for yourself, to find yourself, to make yourself heard. That is the show's central message. It's a bleak message, but it is also revolutionary.
Toby is abusive. Spencer's friends see it and deplore it. The show sees it and deplores it. We, the audience, are supposed to see it too. The swelling music, the romance - all of that is a distraction. The friendship between those four extraordinary, beautiful, brave girls: that is what is real.
But I find myself wanting to respond to something I read today. I'm putting the rest of this behind a cut, because it contains spoilers, and also some discussion of bullying, abusive relationships and a relationship between a teacher and student.
The link is to a great piece of commentary by Tumblr user Prozacpark, and is about the relationship between Toby and Spencer. Prozacpark views Toby as abusive - and I think this reading is correct. Where I differ is whether the text frames this abuse with approval or not.
The thing about this show is firstly that it puts the friendships of teenage girls front and centre, and makes the things about those relationships that are normally deplored (their intensity, the high value placed on them by girls, their potential for 'drama') and makes them heroic and shows them to be a source of strength. (It arguably does the same for other relationships between girls and women - romantic relationships between lesbians, relationships between mothers and daughters, but to a much lesser extent.) What's amazing is less that the main characters have strong friendships with other girls, but that those friendships are the central relationship and the entire story of the show as a whole. Their antagonist(s) bully and abuse them in a kind of stereotypical Mean Girls way: harassing them online and through text messages, threatening to share their deepest secrets, trying to get them to turn on another in an exaggerated version of schoolyard politics. (That this bullying and abuse is actually life-threatening is entirely the point. Just as female relationships are celebrated for their strength, their darker side is taken seriously as a threat.) So all relationships outside this central friendship - romantic, familial or friendships with boys with whom the characters are not romantically involved - are secondary. That's not to say that they're not deeply important, but they are not the focus of the show or the driving force of the narrative.
Secondly, Toby is abusive and isolating towards Spencer, but I think that's entirely the point. The show has a pretty bleak attitude towards relationships between teenage girls and boys or men. Let's recap:
Apart from Emily's father, all the fathers on the show are indifferent on a good day and manipulative and controlling on a bad day towards their daughters. More specifically, they either explicitly or implicitly attempt to control their daughters' sexuality. (That's not to say that they don't sometimes voice valid disapproval of their daughters' actions - something I'll get back to later.) They also lie to their daughters and lie to their partners about very serious things in their lives. Apart from Emily's father, they are not trustworthy.
Every other male character not currently in a relationship with one of the Liars has either attempted to kill them or been involved in the A Team in some manner.
Caleb is the only boyfriend of the main three girls-who-are-attracted-to-guys not to behave in an abusive manner (and, if you think the female love interest is getting off lightly, I'll add that Paige was initially abusive towards Emily).
Ezra Fitz, is, at least heavily involved in the A Team (although if he's the one ultimately calling the shots I will be very surprised), was in a long-term relationship with Aria, a girl he knew was a teenager and who was and still is his student. I actually really liked their relationship (because I have a thing for fictional relationships with power imbalances), but of course would have found it horrifying in real life. While I don't think he behaved in a particularly controlling manner towards Aria (at least not on the surface, but if he's on the A Team, he's good at manipulating people and probably was able to make it seem that she was the one calling the shots in the relationship), the fact remains that such a relationship was highly inappropriate and open for abuse. I detest Aria's father, but he was right in being horrified at this relationship.
And Toby, too, is abusive and controlling. As the linked Tumblr post points out, he uses Spencer's fear of abandonment as a way of controlling her, and very deliberately isolates her from her friends.
It's my contention, however, that the show is aware of this and subtly makes its disapproval known. That is the beauty of this show. Men are, for the most part, controlling, and they fear nothing more than the sexuality and power of teenage girls, and the strength that they draw from their friendships. If you find such a friendship, hold onto it, cherish it, fight viciously for it, for it's within such friendships that you will be able to carve out a space for yourself, to find yourself, to make yourself heard. That is the show's central message. It's a bleak message, but it is also revolutionary.
Toby is abusive. Spencer's friends see it and deplore it. The show sees it and deplores it. We, the audience, are supposed to see it too. The swelling music, the romance - all of that is a distraction. The friendship between those four extraordinary, beautiful, brave girls: that is what is real.