but I find it hard to be friends with people who aren't prepared to be open about their emotions and personal experiences (and aren't comfortable with me sometimes talking about mine), at least to a certain extent
I think that makes sense. In my experience the leadup to personal things can be gradual, but that's also when a close friendship begins. I made a close friend because we started talking about more personal things, whereas before, we had common interests but that was it. It was when he opened up about some deeply personal things, which allowed me to open up about mine.
One of my challenges making friends is that I don't have kids, which seems to be a key way you make friends as an adult. I've seen "girls' night" events that looked fun, only to realize they were more Mommy and Me events. Which is great for people looking for ways to socialize with kids, but I'm not looking for that as I don't have kids. Another challenge is that everyone has opposite schedules when you're an adult, and sometimes they completely change. In college, weekends were the only time I could really do anything, and everyone was busy on the weekends. For a time after college, weekdays were better. Now it's once again that weekends are the ONLY time I can really see people, but everyone has family obligations or just wants to catch up on sleep. Which I get, but that's really the only option I have. So that makes it hard.
I think in the end, it's largely about making friends who are willing to make the time, and vice versa. It's hard when you can't find many people in the first place, but I do think a lot of it is prioritization. With the close friend I mentioned, he's often invited TO family obligations. In fact, last time we had family in town, they requested his presence. Meanwhile, we have family friends I love seeing. So I think that's a huge part of it, making friends you can blend into familial obligations, OR making friends who become found family in their own right. I think it just happens organically.
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I think that makes sense. In my experience the leadup to personal things can be gradual, but that's also when a close friendship begins. I made a close friend because we started talking about more personal things, whereas before, we had common interests but that was it. It was when he opened up about some deeply personal things, which allowed me to open up about mine.
One of my challenges making friends is that I don't have kids, which seems to be a key way you make friends as an adult. I've seen "girls' night" events that looked fun, only to realize they were more Mommy and Me events. Which is great for people looking for ways to socialize with kids, but I'm not looking for that as I don't have kids. Another challenge is that everyone has opposite schedules when you're an adult, and sometimes they completely change. In college, weekends were the only time I could really do anything, and everyone was busy on the weekends. For a time after college, weekdays were better. Now it's once again that weekends are the ONLY time I can really see people, but everyone has family obligations or just wants to catch up on sleep. Which I get, but that's really the only option I have. So that makes it hard.
I think in the end, it's largely about making friends who are willing to make the time, and vice versa. It's hard when you can't find many people in the first place, but I do think a lot of it is prioritization. With the close friend I mentioned, he's often invited TO family obligations. In fact, last time we had family in town, they requested his presence. Meanwhile, we have family friends I love seeing. So I think that's a huge part of it, making friends you can blend into familial obligations, OR making friends who become found family in their own right. I think it just happens organically.