It's interesting you should mention this, because you made me realise that I learnt this skill almost without noticing as a child (in much the same way as one learns how to walk or talk), and then had to relearn it again as an adult, with a great deal of conscious effort.

If you're interested, I can tell you what ultimately ended up working for me (although I'm probably going to write a full post on it anyway), but I realise you may not be looking for advice and rather just wanting to vent, so no worries if it's the latter.