Friday open thread: swallowing the little book of calm

[dolorosa_12]

Well, it has been A Week. I made the preemptive decision some time ago that I would refrain from going online from the point when I went to bed on Tuesday night (UK time) until when I felt in the right frame of mind to deal with the news coming out of the US. That meant no social media, no news websites, and, above all, no hysterical, frenzied, real-time speculation about the election result until the outcome was fairly close to certain.

As a result, instead of feeling like a gibbering wreck for the past few days, I have felt completely serene. I've read three books. I've cooked slow, warming food. I've gone running out in the fens, and done yoga every day. And, best of all, I went out walking at dawn in the eerie mist. Everything was still, and cold, and starkly beautiful, with cows looming out of the fog.

And so, my question to you all, for this week's open thread prompt, is as follows: how do you keep yourself calm? What activities help you maintain a sense of equilibrium? What soothes you?

Comments

[lirazel]

I am so very glad you've had a good week through taking care of yourself!

My calmness strategies are very cliche: taking walks, listening to music, reading, watching good TV.

[dolorosa_12]

Those are all excellent calmness strategies, although I envy your ability to focus on TV when stressed!

[shadaras]

I have been avoiding most forms of social media this week, and instead spending all my time reading. :) Books always work for escapism, once I find the right kind to sink my brain into.

Generally speaking, being out in nature is the most soothing thing I know about of. I love anything that lets me move and be connected with my body, and getting away from electronics for a bit really helps (when I manage it).

I also love martial arts as a centering mechanism. I wish I knew more of a style that did solo practice, but my dojo's been doing masked outdoor weapons practice, and that helps immensely for both physical and social reasons.

[dolorosa_12]

Being out in nature is just the perfect distraction, isn't it? It's so wonderfully calming.

I'm glad your dojo has found a way to make things work in terms of continuing throughout the pandemic — you're right that physical activity is really good at bringing you back to yourself, and shutting out all the external noise and stress.

[luzula]

I'm not on social media at all (except for DW). Otherwise: talking to friends, being outside, reading comfort books/fic, eating really good gelato, creating things (mostly writing), doing small concrete things to improve the world.

[dolorosa_12]

Those are all marvellous calming strategies, and I particularly appreciate that they're a mixture of caring for the self, and caring for others, and internal and external activities.

[isis]

Running is my calming activity. Also cooking. They probably cancel each other out!

Also, I feel calmer when I'm obsessively following the news, actually - I like to know what is going on!

[dolorosa_12]

Hahaha, running and cooking are definitely calming activities for me too!

I'm in awe of the fact that you find obsessively following the news calming — for most people it seems to have the opposite effect!

[isis]

I should specify I mean real news, e.g. the Washington Post, the New York Times, the Guardian, and a local and regional newspaper website.  And I don't read the comments.  I stay away from Twitter and Facebook - those definitely don't calm me down!

[dolorosa_12]

Oh yes, I assumed that's what you meant. I used to find that kind of news calming as well — back in the days when I lived with my family and we got a print copy of the newspaper every day, and I read it in the morning.

It's the frenzied flood of news and analysis being posted in real-time on newspapers' websites (usually in the form of a politics livefeed) that I can't handle, especially since it tends to involve intense speculation without all the facts being known.

I agree with you regarding Twitter and Facebook.

[singedsun]

All my calm these days comes from Yoga and no/very little talking ASMR videos. And when it's really bad, I sit on the edge of my tub, put a few inches of water in with some bubble bath and epsom salts and soak my feet for 20-30 minutes and read. It's a nice getaway in my own house.

[dolorosa_12]

Yoga is such a good calming mechanism, isn't it? I normally aim to do it three times a week, but for November I'm aiming to do it every day of the month, and so far I've succeeded.

That bubble (foot)bath idea sounds so wonderful — the warming, soothing effects of a bath, without the time and effort required to have a full bath (which never seems worth it unless you're in there for ages).

[forestofglory]

Since shelter in place went into effect in March (it still hasn't completely lifed here) I have been stress quilting. I have started six quilts and finished three. I find making stuff with my hands really soothing. I have slightly reduced the amount of fabric I have in my stash, and increased the amount of snuggly quilts in the world.

[dolorosa_12]

I've really enjoyed seeing your quilts take shape via Instagram — they're so beautiful and impressive. Making stuff with your hands is extremely soothing — for me cleaning, gardening or cooking has a similar effect.

[forestofglory]

Thank you! I'm glad that you have similar things to do.

[bruttimabuoni]

That sounds like a very healthy approach to this week.

My calmness stems a lot from yoga too, and from walking while noticing. Or, often, walking while listening to podcasts if I want company on boring, repetitive walks at present - there's something about voice production that soothes me. Reading doesn't, or doesn't any more. I like cooking, too - as a hobby in general but I like the physicality of chopping and stirring when things get tense.

[dolorosa_12]

That sounds like a very healthy approach to this week.

It's really helped, although the problem is that once I felt capable of engaging with the news, it's become addictive and I can't stop watching things unfold. It's become a real distraction!

I like the sound of all your calming strategies, most of which I share.

[likeadeuce]

I enjoy taking myself for walks -- fortunately the weather in Virginia has generally been excellent throughout the too-many-months of social distancing so I am familiarizing myself with local parks as well as just the circuit around my neighborhood. Walking by myself with headphones on to listen to music or a book or a podcast is very relaxing while still active and I've indulged in it this week in particular. On Wednesday, I went with my Mom up to Skyline Drive in the Blue Ridge Mountains (which I've been jonesing to visit since reading the Raven Cycle books this summer and finally got a chance to do), yesterday I drove a ways out of town to walk around a nature preserve, and today I just did several circuits around the park nearby where I saw a lot of birds (ironically many more than in the nature preserve!)

[dolorosa_12]

I think I saw the place you went for your walk, and it looked so incredibly beautiful — what a stunningly lovely part of the world!

You're lucky to have nice weather that keeps you outdoors. It's basically rained for the whole of October here, which made the prospect of lots of outdoor walking way less appealling. I've still tried to keep up running and the occasional walk, but it was much easier to do so during the summer!

I'm glad you've found ways to keep yourself relaxed during this past stressful week.

[lyr]

There is a wild, open field behind my house where people keep their horses. When I need some calm, I take a walk there and feed some apples to horses. Nature's so soothing, and there's something particularly calming about petting the soft nose of a horse.

[dolorosa_12]

Oh, that sounds absolutely wonderful! How lucky you are to have those horses so nearby!