Beyond Selidor

I, like you (and just about every shy geeky teenage girl I know) had a crush on Spike. It seems to be some sort of rite of passage.

The difference between the Spike/Buffy relationship and that of, say, Edward and Bella, though, is that Spike and Buffy's relationship is criticised explicitly within the show (by the characters themselves, in fact) as being extremely unhealthy, whereas Edward and Bella's is portrayed as being epic and oh so romantic.

I think as a shy, inexperienced teenager one of the most powerful and pervasive ideas is that relationships are somehow redemptive and transformative. In most cases, they aren't, or at least not in the way they're depicted in fiction. Oh, sure, relationships change you, but they very rarely redeem you, as that kind of change usually needs to be sparked from within and and not by external forces.

But I have a sort of protective attitude towards Twilight fans because it's pretty obvious with my temperament and reading tastes, I would've been one myself.