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dolorosa_12Day 11. Do you feel protective over someone?
Was there ever a question designed for me or what? The answer is an emphatic yes. I feel protective over a great number of people. My default mode seems to be 'mother'.
These people range from family members to close or long-term friends to less close friends. I seem to be the person that a lot of my friends come to when they have a problem, when they feel hurt or worried or scared. It's bit of a chicken-egg situation; I'm not sure if this came first or if my mothering personality did.
People bring me their problems for a lot of different reasons. Sometimes they have a plan of attack already, and just want to bounce their ideas off someone else before going ahead and solving whatever problem they're facing. Sometimes they're in a really bad place, bewildered and wanting advice. And sometimes all they want to do is talk or complain and have someone listen. I used to get into difficulties in earlier times because my immediate reaction when someone tells me about a problem is to start suggesting ways to help them. And sometimes they don't want that! I used to get really hurt when people would get angry at me in these situations ('but I'm trying to HELP you!'), before taking a step back and thinking. Then I realised that I used to do exactly the same thing with my mother. I would whine and complain to her about various things, and she'd suggest things I could do to fix them. And then I'd be all, 'but I just want to whine and get sympathy! Why are you giving me advice?'. So I'm clearly modelling my behaviour on hers.
So these days I try better to ascertain what a certain person actually wants when he or she comes to me with problems. If they want suggestions, all well and good. And if they just want to talk, I'll listen.
Day 12. If you could trade places with anyone for one week, who would it be and why?
Day 13. Where do you see your best friend in 10 years?
Day 14. When you are stressed, what can you use as an outlet? Why do you think it helps you?
Day 15. What do you believe in? And not just God or atheism.
Day 16. What are you passionate about?
Day 17. Who was the last person you kissed? (If you are still with them now, pick the person before them.) What would they say if they saw you now?
Day 18. Talk about your extended family. Why do you think they are the way they are?
Day 19. If you could be anywhere in the world, but you had to be there for a certain cause, where would you be and why?
Day 20. Again, pick a song that projects the mood of your week or day.
Day 21. Look back. Why did you choose this challenge? Do you think it says anything about you?
Day 22. How do you think people see you? Be a little negative and a little positive.
Day 23. Explain your life plan for the next month, then the next year, then three years, then five years.
Day 24. Are you more social or independent? Why do you think that is?
Day 25. What do you think it means to be a good parent?
Day 26. Talk about a moment where you were truly happy. What was happening? Who were you with?
Day 27. Is there a friend you are worried about? Why do they have you concerned? Do you think they’ll be okay?
Day 28. Would you rather someone tell you the truth up front but gently, or be lied to to spare your feelings?
Day 29. If you could be doing the same things you do now, only in your own way, how would a normal day in your life go?
Day 30. Look back on this last month and talk about it.
Was there ever a question designed for me or what? The answer is an emphatic yes. I feel protective over a great number of people. My default mode seems to be 'mother'.
These people range from family members to close or long-term friends to less close friends. I seem to be the person that a lot of my friends come to when they have a problem, when they feel hurt or worried or scared. It's bit of a chicken-egg situation; I'm not sure if this came first or if my mothering personality did.
People bring me their problems for a lot of different reasons. Sometimes they have a plan of attack already, and just want to bounce their ideas off someone else before going ahead and solving whatever problem they're facing. Sometimes they're in a really bad place, bewildered and wanting advice. And sometimes all they want to do is talk or complain and have someone listen. I used to get into difficulties in earlier times because my immediate reaction when someone tells me about a problem is to start suggesting ways to help them. And sometimes they don't want that! I used to get really hurt when people would get angry at me in these situations ('but I'm trying to HELP you!'), before taking a step back and thinking. Then I realised that I used to do exactly the same thing with my mother. I would whine and complain to her about various things, and she'd suggest things I could do to fix them. And then I'd be all, 'but I just want to whine and get sympathy! Why are you giving me advice?'. So I'm clearly modelling my behaviour on hers.
So these days I try better to ascertain what a certain person actually wants when he or she comes to me with problems. If they want suggestions, all well and good. And if they just want to talk, I'll listen.
Day 12. If you could trade places with anyone for one week, who would it be and why?
Day 13. Where do you see your best friend in 10 years?
Day 14. When you are stressed, what can you use as an outlet? Why do you think it helps you?
Day 15. What do you believe in? And not just God or atheism.
Day 16. What are you passionate about?
Day 17. Who was the last person you kissed? (If you are still with them now, pick the person before them.) What would they say if they saw you now?
Day 18. Talk about your extended family. Why do you think they are the way they are?
Day 19. If you could be anywhere in the world, but you had to be there for a certain cause, where would you be and why?
Day 20. Again, pick a song that projects the mood of your week or day.
Day 21. Look back. Why did you choose this challenge? Do you think it says anything about you?
Day 22. How do you think people see you? Be a little negative and a little positive.
Day 23. Explain your life plan for the next month, then the next year, then three years, then five years.
Day 24. Are you more social or independent? Why do you think that is?
Day 25. What do you think it means to be a good parent?
Day 26. Talk about a moment where you were truly happy. What was happening? Who were you with?
Day 27. Is there a friend you are worried about? Why do they have you concerned? Do you think they’ll be okay?
Day 28. Would you rather someone tell you the truth up front but gently, or be lied to to spare your feelings?
Day 29. If you could be doing the same things you do now, only in your own way, how would a normal day in your life go?
Day 30. Look back on this last month and talk about it.
