Beyond Selidor

This has been a pattern for me too, but in my experience it can be a double-edged sword. It's a fast track to feeling close to someone, and sometimes that works out, but I've also had it happen where it led to a degree of closeness and oversharing that began to feel smothering to me. And once you're there, it's not the most comfortable thing to try to walk it back and bring the friendship down to a lower level.

That's an excellent point. Or it's oversharing without any authentic closeness, which can be dangerous - but even if it's nothing more than irritating, it does mean you may have become more of a support system than a true friendship. A true friendship should allow for the balance you mentioned.

In retrospect, I had one that definitely went very quickly to all personal all the time. It did become necessary - we both went through some pretty awful things, and I'm glad we had each other's backs, but there was a level of codependence and an inevitable mini-fallout.

I agree that a slower burn leads to more lasting friendships.