Flat. Like lemonade.
Aug. 25th, 2010 08:22 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dolorosa_12I've been feeling kind of dispirited all week since coming back from Ireland, but I don't think it's just related to leaving Donegal behind. I think it's more a build-up of feelings.
Basically, since late June, I haven't really been alone.
From the last week of June until the last week of July, my mum was here. Although we weren't staying in the same place the entire time, we saw one another every single day, for about 3/4 of the day, on average. Not only is she not around here any more, she's not really around to talk to, as she's been in New York since leaving the UK, and has only sporadic internet access.
For the last week of July, Alex was here and we were in London together. He's currently at Toronto srafcon and thus not around much online either.
Then I went to Ireland, where I was (for the first week) sharing a house with three other people and a room with one person, and (for the second week) sharing a house with ten other people and a room with one person, as well as basically being surrounded by people for every waking minute.
I share my house with four other people, all of whom are my friends, so it's not like I'm entirely alone, but it's a different kind of not-aloneness, if that makes sense.
It's a bit of a shock to the system to return to Cambridge. I feel kind of mopey and melancholy, and am finding it difficult to get back into ASNaC life, both academically and socially. I should be all right in a few more days, but for now, I don't feel great.
I guess it's good that I can at least recognise why I feel like this, as although there's not much I can do about it, I do know that this feeling will pass soon. For now, though, all I can do is go for long walks in the rain to clear my head (as I did today).
*sigh*
Basically, since late June, I haven't really been alone.
From the last week of June until the last week of July, my mum was here. Although we weren't staying in the same place the entire time, we saw one another every single day, for about 3/4 of the day, on average. Not only is she not around here any more, she's not really around to talk to, as she's been in New York since leaving the UK, and has only sporadic internet access.
For the last week of July, Alex was here and we were in London together. He's currently at Toronto srafcon and thus not around much online either.
Then I went to Ireland, where I was (for the first week) sharing a house with three other people and a room with one person, and (for the second week) sharing a house with ten other people and a room with one person, as well as basically being surrounded by people for every waking minute.
I share my house with four other people, all of whom are my friends, so it's not like I'm entirely alone, but it's a different kind of not-aloneness, if that makes sense.
It's a bit of a shock to the system to return to Cambridge. I feel kind of mopey and melancholy, and am finding it difficult to get back into ASNaC life, both academically and socially. I should be all right in a few more days, but for now, I don't feel great.
I guess it's good that I can at least recognise why I feel like this, as although there's not much I can do about it, I do know that this feeling will pass soon. For now, though, all I can do is go for long walks in the rain to clear my head (as I did today).
*sigh*
