Friday open thread: small joys

[dolorosa_12]

It's been a long, and busy summer, and my availability on Dreamwidth has suffered a lot as a result, but I finally think things have calmed down to the point that I can commit to these Friday prompt posts with some degree of regularity.

Let's ease back into things with a pleasant prompt:

What are some (small, low-cost or free) things that you do regularly that make your life better and happier?

I was brought up by a mother whose solution to all life's ills was to go outside for a walk, so it's striking that it took me until the pandemic lockdowns to start doing this (other than walking with the purpose of getting to a specific place, which I've always done; my main mode of transport is my feet). But one of the things Matthias and I implemented in the first week of working from home was regular lunchtime walks — a way to see something other than the walls of our house, and a way to break up the day. After returning to hybrid working, I stuck to this routine on days when I worked in the office, and it's astonishing how much it's improved my mood.

The ritual of making tea for breakfast, or my morning coffee, in a slow, deliberate way, with nice ingredients.

Reading books while eating breakfast, and a general 'no social media before mid-morning or after dinner' rule, implemented ruthlessly at times of mental pressure.

Being awake in the early morning, and starting my day (especially on weekends) when most other people prefer to stay in bed.

Listening to music while cooking crepes for Sunday breakfast, or while drinking a glass of wine when preparing dinner on the weekend (which is, in fact, what I'm going to do once I've caught up on Dreamwidth).

I used to be terrible about hoarding the nice things people gave me as presents or that I bought to use only on special occasions. Then I realised that those special occasions might never happen, or my tastes would change and I'd no longer like the thing by the time I'd slowly used it up over years (and in some cases decades). I decided that everyday life was the special occasion, and if I wanted to light the expensive candle or use the 'good' olive oil or perfume, I had permission to do so.

What about you?

Comments

[yarnofariadne]

Keeping a paper journal! When I'm really struggling to get my thoughts in order and/or if my head's just in a really bad place and I can't figure out why, emptying my head onto physical paper and working it out as I write has always helped me immensely. Typing doesn't quite do the same thing for me.

Also, living around free museums and art galleries is such a joy. It still costs me to get into the city centre now that we live closer to the coast, but I still try to go when I can. Engaging with art and culture has always improved my mood and made me happy, and if I'm in a creative rut it tends to help untangle whatever knots I've tied myself into. It gets my brain going again in very satisfying ways.

[dolorosa_12]

Paper journals are so wonderful, for exactly the reason you specify — so mentally healing.

I love that so many museums and galleries in the UK are free — it's one of the best things about this country, and I'm glad you've got so many in close proximity.

[rmc28]

Cycling rather than taking the bus, in particular for the school run and getting to the ice rink (going to the ice rink is a big expensive thing I do to make my life better and happier!). The timing is much more predictable, and the exercise settles both me and my child.

The route to the rink has a particularly lovely stretch alongside the river through Stourbridge Common and Ditton Meadows, and then alongside a field which often holds horses. I love the river and the space and the sight of the animals, it's all good. (Less fun in the rain, but that's what waterproofs are for.)

Cold-brew tea made in the fridge and/or home-made tea latte with soy milk heated in the microwave, for small pleasures. I can drink cow milk, but specifically for tea latte I prefer the lack-of-sweetness of soy.

[dolorosa_12]

Oh, that route to the rink is a gorgeous one — I know exactly where you mean, and it must be so glorious to glide through there, especially in nice weather! And I totally agree with you about travelling between places on your own steam (in my case walking, cycling in yours) — it clears the head and helps settle the emotions, and I find it puts me in the right frame of mind to start work (or to leave difficult parts of work behind at the end of the working day).

[pauraque]

Looking at birds! They're everywhere, even in the city, and watching what they're doing in their world takes me out of my own head.

[dolorosa_12]

How glorious! Our garden is home to a lot of birds, and I really appreciate watching them from the bedroom window, or when I'm out in the garden.

[topaz119]

Having (and using) dozens of spices and condiments and oils and vinegars. (A repairman recently opened my fridge and told me he’d never seen so many jars and bottles.) People give them to me as gifts or I see a recipe & go get that random spice it needs, etc, etc. But it means that even if I’m just making a protein & veg & carbs, it tastes totally different. It’s the difference between slogging through getting dinner on the table every night & being involved & entertained as I putter around & then get to eat something delicious

[dolorosa_12]

I love this! I too am an avid collector (and user) of spices, condiments, etc, and have always wished I had space for a spice rack, since I just find them aesthetically pleasing. We have a lot of storage space in the kitchen, but for various reasons, a spice rack wouldn't work.

Your dinners sound delightful — both the taste and preparation!

[raven]

I'm struggling with this the last couple of years, as one of the unfailing encroaches of cluster headache is the small pleasures of life it means you are now Not Allowed (on last count, it was something like hot baths, most types of exercise, nail polish, candles, incense, coffee, alcohol, sex, anything involving being awake before midday, and sunshine). A lot of my small pleasures used to come from my clothes, but it's mostly done for that too. Having said that, if you're willing to piss people off you can maintain a few, so I'm going to say scented candles, nail polish topcoats in particular (there's one horrendous one called Seche Vite that is clearly 100% terrible toxins but one coat makes any ordinary polish rock hard and salon glossy, and I love it), and the joy of the perfect outfit. One thing that does make me happy every day is picking out my jewellery to match the neckline of whatever I'm wearing, and also when the weather cools a bit, there's the joy of deciding on outerwear. I have about six different much-adored coats and have a particular mood for each - eg. on butch days only the black trench coat or the brown leather jacket will serve, other days it's the wool coat, on yet other days the blue, etc. And like you, I go for walks. Long evening walks (and, in due course, long evening walks in the right coat).

Oh, and stickers! I really like spending £2 on a nerd sticker, which you get to spend time picking out and then it comes from the internet as a charming present from past you. Way more than £2 of joy, is what I'm saying there.

[dolorosa_12]

Like you, I appreciate a good scented candle, and stickers, and nail polish (although I don't have the patience for it most of the time), and jewellery (in my case earrings). And I agree 100% about the joy of the perfect piece of outerwear, and am rather envious of your six coats!

Long evening walks (and, in due course, long evening walks in the right coat).


I love it!

[lirazel]

Always keeping my eyes open for especially good trees or beautiful flowers.

Taking a shower before bed. There is no feeling like sliding into bed clean and cool.

Surrounding myself with art that I love.

Listening to whole albums. I just like going on a whole journey with an artist instead of hearing random songs like on the radio.

No algorithms. I refuse to use social media that makes my choices for me. On Instagram and Tumblr, I ONLY look at the accounts I follow (which I'm intentional about) in reverse chronological order. That's the only way I want to see internet "content."

Writing life updates for my journal. It gives me a chance to record for my future self what Im' thinking about or concerned about or looking forward to at a given time in my life. I tried for years to consistently keep a physical journal, but I would start it and abandon it. By knowing that there are a few friends out there who might actually care about what's going on with me, I feel enough of a desire to actually write it down.

Paying for a yoga class. I do not have the will power to make myself exercise. But when I pay for a class, I go because I refuse to waste my money, and once I'm there, I'm obviously going to do what the teacher says. That's the only kind of exercising I can consistently do!

[dolorosa_12]

I love all of these things so much!

I find that I'm more aware of trees and flowers now that a) I have a garden and b) I use Instagram and post a lot of pictures of various growing things. They're such bright spots in the day.

Listening to whole albums. I just like going on a whole journey with an artist instead of hearing random songs like on the radio.

I do this, but I find increasingly that I listen to whole concerts, where again it feels as if the artist is taking you on a very specific journey.

I agree with what you say about Dreamwidth — having that built-in audience helps make it feel worthwhile, and because I tag things very deliberately (and excessively), it's easy for me to go back and get a glimpse of my past life. I do keep a paper journal as well, but with no pressure to do so consistently, and I find that works well.

[lirazel]

, but I find increasingly that I listen to whole concerts, where again it feels as if the artist is taking you on a very specific journey.

I love that!

I do keep a paper journal as well, but with no pressure to do so consistently, and I find that works well.

Nice!

[tellshannon815]

Visiting the local cats I first befriended during lockdown!

[dolorosa_12]

Excellent! (And that icon is perfect.)

[lyr]

I feel you on many of these, especially a nice walk. I also enjoy a good soak with a bathbomb, a cuddle with my puppies in the afternoon sunshine on the couch, relaxing in a freshly clean house, painting my toenails, a half hour of leisurely yoga, and hanging crystals in the breakfast room windows where they throw rainbows in the autumn evenings.

[dolorosa_12]

All of these sound blissful — I'm also very fond of yoga, baths, and the feeling of a freshly clean house.

[ambyr]

I very much enjoy starting my day early in the morning, when I can be entirely by myself with no expectations from others! (This did cause a little friction on my last vacation, when one of my companions kept getting out of bed early "to keep you company, so you're not alone." I do not own mornings, of course! Other people are allowed to be morning people, too! I just...don't want them dragging themselves out of bed for me.)

[dolorosa_12]

I've always been a morning person (when I was a teenager I used to regularly get up at 5.30 or 6am and practice piano while no one else was awake) — I'm at my sharpest and most energetic in the early morning, and like you I just like that feeling of being alone, with no expectations. I can see why that would have caused friction during your holiday — it's making me feel a bit defensive of my own solitary mornings myself, just reading about it!

[isis]

I too love my solitary early mornings. In the summer, it's cool enough to sit in our outdoor hot tub; in the winter, sunrise (or rather, the early morning alpenglow on the mountains to the northwest) is spectacular.

I also always make my cookies from scratch and never buy them. This gives me pleasure to bake, and to eat.

[dolorosa_12]

In the summer, it's cool enough to sit in our outdoor hot tub; in the winter, sunrise (or rather, the early morning alpenglow on the mountains to the northwest) is spectacular.

Oh wow, this sounds so peaceful and atmospheric — what a lovely thing to be abel to experience regularly!

Baking is like witchcraft to me (I'm a great cook and a terrible baker), but the smell of freshly baked cookies is amazing, and definitely worth doing from scratch. How delicious!

[mific]

Watching the sparrows eat birdseed at the manky bird table I made. They don't need it as it's not too cold here, so it's a treat.
Getting out to at least sit in my garden once a day, and usually pottering about in it a bit.
Breakfasting on a toasted multigrain bagel with butter, promite (a milder, sweeter type of vegemite) and humus.
Cups of tea - gumboot and various herb ones.
Doing art while listening to excellent podfics.

[dolorosa_12]

Oooh, all of these sound lovely (apart from the promite and hummus — I love vegemite, and I love hummus, but I'm struggling to imagine them together; I'm happy you like them, though). I'm so impressed by your handmade bird table, and the sparrows it's attracted — watching the birds in our garden is one of my small joys as well.

[adore]

My matcha breakfast drink. Starting the day with reading fiction. My lemongrass bathsoap. Choosing my outfit. Brushing my hair with a boar bristle brush and then with a neem comb to see that all the buildup in my hair is gone! My tarot and oracle decks, and pulling a card or few to journal with. Cute stationery (on which I write memos). Dreamwidth (the writing, and reading of). Sitting at my comfy desk and looking at the balcony, which an Indian palm squirrel visits regularly and adorably for the peanuts I put there. Watching and listening to k-pop. Writing fiction and feeling that slow drip of satisfaction when I finish drafting a chapter.

[dolorosa_12]

Oh, these all sound so delightfully cosy and nurturing! And the Indian palm squirrel looks so cute!

[wearing_tearing]

I'm also someone who appreciates the ritual of making tea <3

I've also recently started picking an ambience video to match my current read and putting that on the TV. It's so nice to read a book with crinkling fireplace sounds in the background or slow and mysterious piano music playing :D

[dolorosa_12]

I've also recently started picking an ambience video to match my current read and putting that on the TV. It's so nice to read a book with crinkling fireplace sounds in the background or slow and mysterious piano music playing

Oh wow, I love this — what a great idea!

And making tea is so lovely and soothing, isn't it. It's something I deliberately do slowly, in order to extend the effect.

[luzula]

Very late comment, but here is a song re: your last point. : )

ETA: Or did I link you to that already?? I know I linked someone to it...

[dolorosa_12]

Very late reply, but that song is perfect!