First lines meme

[dolorosa_12]

Via lirazel, a fun fanfic meme:

List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line. Then tag 10 authors! consider yourselves tagged if you want to do this!



1. When I realised where Yolande was taking me, I wished I'd asked for more details.

Like the whispering wind you stand here with me; Sunshine (McKinley); Sunshine&Yolande, Sunshine/Con

2. He came when I called.

Trees there will be — apples, fruits maybe; Sunshine (McKinley); Sunshine/Con

3.Several months after the end of Drede's high kingship, and the confused scattering of the forces of Sirle, Sybel and Coren journeyed north.

Drowned in A Sea of Sound; The Forgotten Beasts of Eld; Sybel/Coren

4. On winter's nights in Eldwold, the light left the sky early, and the stars shone cold and bright.

With Flames at Their Heels; Forgotten Beast of Eld; Sybel&Maelga

5. 'Do you know where we're supposed to be going, my lord?'

Immrama; Pagan Chronicles; Pagan & Roland

6. It was, inevitably, Warden's idea.

Dreaming After Dawn; The Bone Season series; Warden/Paige

7. The first thing she noticed was the sky.

The Light of Unfamiliar Stars, Reflected; Galax Arena; Allyman/Presh

8. As the hour grew late, and the two moons lay heavy in the clear winter sky, three figures lingered after the evening's feasting and festivities.

Gather Your Memories Against the Dark; The Lions of Al-Rassan; Jehane/Ammar/Rodrigo/(Miranda)

9. Nadya moved through the silent landscape, taking care to allow her feet to leave clear tracks in the snow.

Your Hand on the Pages; Something Dark and Holy series; Malachiasz/Nadya

10. In the early hours of the morning, when the sun was spilling through the window of their room, Una and Marcus slipped downstairs, their feet soft on the warm tiles, and crept, undetected, down to the pier, where Marcus's little boat was waiting.

Dancing on the Water; Romanitas trilogy; Marcus/Una

11. Sybel and Coren clung to the Liralen's soft feathers, and looked around in wonder.

The Beat of Her Wings; The Forgotten Beasts of Eld; Sybel/Coren

12. One night, in the depths of winter, when the branches snapped and broke under the weight of ice, and the stars themselves seemed frozen in the sky, the wizard Ogam went wandering.

Voices from Between the Stars; The Forgotten Beasts of Eld; Sybel

13. It was a sweltering summer's day when Noviana Una returned to Rome to make her formal surrender to Makaria.

Scatter like paper in the eye of the storm; Romanitas trilogy; Una&Makaria&Lal&Maralah

14. This is hopeless,' Alina said, weaving her way through throngs of people, trying to keep the stress and exasperation from her voice.

Hands of Silver, Hands of Gold; Grisha trilogy; Alina/Nikolai

15. She stepped out into the sunshine.

Six Crossings; Ancient Greek mythology; Hades/Persephone

16. Vasya stayed as long as she could bear.

What the Sky Looks Like from Your View; Winternight trilogy; Vasya/Morozko

17. It was an odd little group.

After Exaltation; The Dark Is Rising sequence; Merriman&the Black Rider

18. Elia found him in the grove.

Drink the Earth; The Queens of Innis Lear; Elia/Ban the Fox

19. They were called to power at the same time, though it was so long ago that no record of their calling remained, save their own memories.

Winter Branches; The Dark Is Rising sequence; Merriman&the Black Rider

20. Nina woke abruptly, sprawled in a tangled heap on the floor.

A Road Made of Stars; Six of Crows duology; Nina/Matthias



Some patterns:

Throwing readers immediately into things, with action already underway

Alternatively, meandering, ponderous, fairytale style sentences — usually for fandoms whose canonical material has a fairytale tone

Using the sky, the season, or celestial bodies to evoke a mood

I use first person in canons whose source material is written in the first person (Sunshine, Pagan Chronicles), although not for Galax Arena (which is written in the first person, but I never write fic from that character's perspective). Capturing Pagan Kidrouk's internal voice is really, really hard

I loathe present tense (I make a sole exception for it in the Pagan Chronicles) — I hate it as a reader, and I'm never going to perpetuate it as a writer. This ... puts me at odds with the vast majority of other fanfic writers

I think my favourite opening is number 12, Voice from Between the Stars, although to be honest my favourite lines of my own writing tend to appear further on in my fic, rather than in the opening lines. In fact, I'd be interested in repeating this exercise with the closing lines, since I tend to prefer these in my own work, and put the most effort into them.

Comments

[isis]

I'm with you on present tense!

I'll try to remember to do this meme when I get back home to my computer sometime next week.

[dolorosa_12]

As I say, I can sometimes take it in small doses, but the book has to be absolutely incredible. (I've just finished The Mirror and the Light, the final book in Hillary Mantel's trilogy about Thomas Cromwell, and I kept forgetting that it was written in present tense, because it has such a past tense tone.)

I'll be interested to see your version of this meme!

[superborb]

I wonder if different fandoms have different tense preferences? I feel like present tense is increasing in prevalence, but it's still mostly past. (Of course, this could be that I prefer past, so I tend to read that more...)

[dolorosa_12]

I feel like there's a kind of slash fanfic megafandom house style, which involves a sort of breathless, present tense internal monologue, as if the point-of-view character is completely overwhelmed with the emotion of the moment. It generally doesn't work for me.

Then again, I'm not normally reading in those fandoms, so I don't tend to encounter it all that often.

[superborb]

Yeah, I don't really enjoy ao3 house style a lot of the time, so I probably end up skipping it even if it's in a fandom I'm in......

[lirazel]

I think my favorites are 12 and 17.

Love seeing your patterns!

I enjoy both past and present tense, but I kind of actively hate first person (despite loving many books that are written in first person), so I feel you.

[dolorosa_12]

I'm glad you liked them!

As I said to isis above, I can handle present tense in small doses, but it has to be really, really good, whereas merely competent past tense doesn't bother me. It's hard to have these kinds of rigid stylistic preferences for the written word, isn't it?

[rekishi]

do iiiiit!

[dolorosa_12]

I think I'll wait a few weeks, just so that my blog has a bit of variety in terms of content...

[likeadeuce]

I appreciate these are short and every one of them left me wanting what comes next.

I am intrigued by the cloing lines idea, now, I feel like i tend to throw those off and hope no one notices, i would bet mine are very samey

[dolorosa_12]

Awww, that's so kind of you to say. I think I write fiction like a journalist, to be honest: a newspaper article is supposed to draw you in from the first line and make you want to read the whole article, and as a former journalist, that aspect of my nonfiction writing seems to have bled into my fiction.

I might do the closing lines version of this in a few weeks' time, just so that my blog here has a bit of variety.

[pauraque]

I probably put more effort into last lines too. I don't think first lines are quite as important in fanfic as they are in pro fiction, since in a fandom context people are more likely to be deciding what to read based on the tags and summary. By the time they see the first line, you've already piqued their interest. But the ending is still super important, since that's the impression they'll be left with.

I'm so used to seeing both past and present tense in my fandoms that I often don't consciously notice which one I'm reading. I do write present tense a fair bit, and I think it can convey several different effects (the "breathless" emotional-immediacy thing you talked about above being only one of them) but I have noticed that it tends to work better in shorter fics.

Then again, I also don't mind first- and even second-person fics if they're done well. I always find it a bit surprising how strongly many readers feel about these things, because to me they're just tools, and like any tool their effectiveness depends entirely on the skill of the person wielding them.

[dolorosa_12]

I don't mind first- or second-person when it's done well — it just feels to me that it's more intrusive. When things are written in past tense and third person, reading just feels to go more smoothly. The same goes for present tense — it makes you notice the writing more. When all this is written competently, the effect can be striking — but when it's done badly, it makes it harder for me to ignore it and just let the story carry me away.

I agree with you about closing sentences.